The Bad Days

On bad days I feel like I’ve lost control. I collapse under the weight of simple tasks. I’m literally snarling. Gnashing my teeth and crying for mercy from someone I don’t believe in. At those times I feel helpless. 

Today was 85 percent this way.

It’s hard to see the light on these days. Harder to manage rejection. Harder to temper the stormy weather. Harder to tame the wild voices.

But I woke up this way today and It wasn’t accompanied by thoughts of suicide. What a milestone this is for me.

Proof that the Abilify was the right choice…

I’m not sold on lamotrigine so much, however. I’m seeing my doctor this week so I’ll see what she thinks.

Things are still all whacked out. I’m hanging on to hope but slipping back is always a frightening thought. Imagine what I may have accomplished if not for so much time spent on wasteful depression and hopelessnsss. 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: