The Way You Make Me Feel

I have always been fascinated by the idea of seeing yourself through another’s eyes. We are our own worst critic, so it’s interesting to find out what people think.

People are intimidated by me. There’s no need to be, I’m a teddy bear. My physical appearance makes people think I’m tough. It actually became a problem at my last job because my bosses expected me to be be this rough and tumble bitch when I’m actually quite soft.

It was frustrating to be seen one way and to never really be able to get passed that.

When I was a teen, I attended a camp through the Canadian co-operative association. It was a pivotal part of my adolescence. One of the most amazing parts of the experience was something called “strength bombardment”.

We dedicated one very special evening to telling one another how each of us had impacted us over the week. We shared directly the things that we thought were special about each person. Everyone got a turn to hear how the others in the group see them.

It was such a positive experience and somewhere down the road I let that slip. 

Just for fun last night, I invited my Facebook friends to describe me in one word. I was curious but I also thought it would be great encouragement for me while I’m working hard.

Funny thing is that 2 months ago I was convinced I knew what the words would be. 2 months ago I was sure it would all be negative.

None of it was. Words were tossed around like, “wonderful” and “unique”. I got such positive feedback about my outspokeness, my art, my personality. I even got called”pretty” and “a babe”.

Someone called me compassionate. Another said I am tenacious.

Is the closest I’ve come to seeing myself through other’s eyes.

I’ve heard that old saying that what other people think of you is none of your business. Sometimes though, the truth is that we need a little encouragement. And there’s no shame in that! It’s nice to know that you’ve got people out there who see the beauty inside you, even when you think your screwing up.

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